Author Topic: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club  (Read 276848 times)

Offline Jozua

Re: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club
« Reply #45 on: January 13, 2014, 05:32:52 PM »
Whilst Rodney was having his fag there was a commotion at the gate and after some  shouting and screaming Kent Kassler was dragged into the room by the security staff. He immediately started pleading for mercy but when he heard Elvis Presley’s voice over a pair of 8" Fostex full rangers all resistance faded from him.

Feeling high and rejuvenated by the smoke in his lungs, Rodney entered the room. Kent was slumped in the chair, his eyes closed with a faint smile on his face as he relived his teenage years whilst Elvis voice reverberated in his ears. Rodney looked at the secretary who without saying a word handed him the surgical knife. The long awaited moment had arrived.

A real audiophile will eventually end up with the ARC Ref stuff..

Offline Rodney_gold

Re: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club
« Reply #46 on: January 13, 2014, 06:33:16 PM »
OMG - how things have changed - instead of the old butt or 2 behind the bicycle shed , there were 7 tik pipes , a few old roaches and a used condom..what the hell do schoolboys get up to these days...

After swallowing a few breath mints and rolling myself in the freshly cut grass to remove the stink of chesterfield red , I sauntered back into the meeting , only to be met by the glaring eyes of the headmaster - I cunningly zipped up my 1/2 unzipped fly and started rubbing the small wet patch I had even more cunningly sprinkled on my trousers ,  using the irrigation system,  in just the right position ,which  proved that indeed I had gone to the little boys room and sat down on my chair.. nothing much had changed since I left barring the fact that it was decided that a recycled paper bag would be greener than an old plastic spar bag for the provision bearer.. who was entrusted with the R10.27 and the humbugs - pickings would be sparse the next meeting....

Ah well , a trip to KFC beforehand would stave off the hunger pangs before 1st break - I reckon I could get away by raising the desk lid and pretending I was looking for a rubber , whilst  sneaking a melrose cheese wedge and a peanut butter and jam sarmie during the course of the meeting.

The next order of business was to elect a committee .. I had a sense of foreboding here - this was not going to be an easy affair ....
Nominations were called for , I shrank back against the wall and slumped in my seat , trying to be as inconspicuous as I could..dammit - I met the headmasters gaze - GOLD he shouted at - SIT up straight you reprobate....
Position of chairman went to the headmaster - no one dared even challenge him - and the pair of audioquest cables he was swinging with intent further convinced us not to do so....
Colonel 66 was also elected unopposed for treasurer - especially since he had promised us the the fees we paid would be invested and would garner 124% interest per month if he deposited them into his trust fund - appropriately name Shyloque PLC , based offshore in the Channel Islands.

Jozua garnered the coveted position of club captain and administrative assistant  after a momentous battle with alleycat .. settled by a shootout between alleycats ML and Jozuas krell FPB600 - muscle and weight won... alleycat very nearly missed having his skull crushed when Jozua heaved the mini nuke powerstation amp at him  and the cut he sustained from the Krells heatsink was patched up in the sick bay.

By this time both Altie and ken with respective spouses/nogschleppers and other sundries had arrived , Alties significant other was promptly voted in club secretary - she was the only one there with with sufficient comprehension and literate skills...apart from that , all of us were struggling to fill in the forms , I had just got past writing my name on top.

It was way past 10pm now and my dentures were hurting like hell , the polident had worn thin and eating that toffee before coming to the meeting didnt help either.. I got up to stretch my legs and tripped over my walking cane.. nearly broke my hip and we all know how long that can take to heal...

It was time for the general committee member board of 12 to be voted on , and considering there were only 11 of us left , we were all voted in...

The structure was now finalised.. much to my relief .. this time I really had to take a pee and meandered to the brass urinal with the mothballs in it to relieve myself... as the stream started to dribble (prostate problems) Masfioso sauntered in and whipped out the biggest schlong I had ever seen in my life - who knew he was so well equipped and that size came in white?... instantly seeing the torpedo my tadpole shriveled and I could not go ... damn , this time the wetspot on my codpiece wasn't an artifice..

So back to the meeting I went clenching my thighs ... and then to the next point of order - who can organise meetings at dealerships..
I suggested we ask ramrod , but was drowned out by a chorus of  :oppo: and retracted - Ken suggested his place , but main road Plumstead becomes a dangerous place after 6 pm..so that was promptly vetoed..I then suggested my place - even tho I'm not a dealer - but the refusal of the Southern suburb crowd to travel further out than Claremont meant that behind the boerewors curtain into the wild west was not an option... naturally that also put hyena's place out of contention... Ah well ..... Could Altie be considered as a dealer? We decided cos he fixes turntables and was Ken's sidekick , the answer was a resounding YES...

At exactly 10.47 , the discussion turned to the Hifi clubs reference system... as the Fees collected had only amounted to R10.37 , drifter kindly offered his 9v Hitachi FM radio - with the broken aerial

Ken was ecstatic , the single driver hifi was being chosen - I volunteered to supply a used 9v battery from my irrigation systems backup..

The next 12 minutes were taken up by a lively confabulation as to whether everready or duracell was better - it was decided that albeit duracell lasted longer , the real 99.9% nickle plated of the everready would naturally sound better - the 2 humbugs were twisted into the tails of Onyxes shirt to dip into the hot beverages as there was no sugar - and we broke for tea

To be continued....




Roon/tidal > Squeezebox touch> Trinnov St2 >2x Devialet D premiers>  Vivid audio Giya G1 spirits ..fully treated room

Offline Kent Kassler

Re: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club
« Reply #47 on: January 13, 2014, 07:54:54 PM »
Rodney for president!!!
Audiophile Sound Sommelier Extraordinaire....aka Manic Depressive Temporary Void Filler Deluxe.

Offline chrisc

  • Trade Count: (+134)
  • AVForums Grandmaster
  • *****
  • Posts: 10,815
  • Total likes: 413
  • Cape Town Hi-Fi Club - get better sound
Re: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club
« Reply #48 on: January 13, 2014, 08:01:09 PM »
Reminds me of a poem by Mark Slaughter...

Violin by Mark R Slaughter

She cried for all the broken hearts,
Painted everlasting winters -
Floral patterns etched in ice;
A frozen tear to
Soften up the bastard bones.

Bow made love to needy string
In cooing fling - wanton whispers
Fondled under pianissimos,
Caressing callous hearts.

Melodrama swayed in satin sound -
Yet the player wasn't there,
Only creamy song - soothing, yearning,
Teasing bitter minds.

I sensed her persevering loneliness
For beauty of an evening,
Romance of a tune - laughing,
Sobbing at the fire.

Then a climax -
Writhing passion cutting deep -
Wounding macho flesh;

And all in a work of musical art:
Ephemeral stories, yarned of music
Honed impossibly through her tones.
Music is the shorthand of emotion

Offline Rodney_gold

Re: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club
« Reply #49 on: January 13, 2014, 10:20:41 PM »
I feel a Haiku coming on...

Old farts Gather
Viagra with coffee
Little acorns mighty okes become.


Roon/tidal > Squeezebox touch> Trinnov St2 >2x Devialet D premiers>  Vivid audio Giya G1 spirits ..fully treated room

Offline skollie

  • R.I.P.
  • Trade Count: (+5)
  • AVForums Grandmaster
  • *****
  • Posts: 5,915
  • Total likes: 1
  • Cableth make no differenth. Ith all in the plugth.
    • Blue Angel
Re: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club
« Reply #50 on: January 13, 2014, 10:40:34 PM »
Never mind Rodney, it will not be as formal as that and we don't have to wait for the head master to open up.  Actually, at one other committee meeting, we spent 45 mins arguing about the sort of biscuits that should be brought to meetings

I hope your wit and verbosity extends to some succinct comments on the night - you are coming aren't you?  I know the southern suburbs are a different country to folk on the Tygergberg Hills.   Here we mostly stop for stop streets and don't go through red lights for more than a second or two.

And if all else fails, the McDonalds opposite Kenilworth Centre is open 24 hours in case you cannot make it home without something to tide you over

Don't go to the high school by mistake, it will be all silent and full of the ghosts of pupils past

Beeno or Eukanuba Lite?

mafioso
If you don't like my principles, I have others - Groucho Marx

Offline Kent Kassler

Re: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club
« Reply #51 on: January 13, 2014, 10:58:23 PM »
Rodney,if i am reading you correctly.....?....are you suggesting a name change to "The Cape Town Bi-Guy Club" :point:?
Audiophile Sound Sommelier Extraordinaire....aka Manic Depressive Temporary Void Filler Deluxe.

Offline Rodney_gold

Re: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club
« Reply #52 on: January 13, 2014, 11:01:35 PM »
Yeh, I will be there..I have the Oswa all loaded up with Meridian gear , koeksusters and melktert.. The team of 8 are grazing on them thar Tygerberg hills and will be fresh and watered , I have the pail of lard I keep for axle grease all topped up and my Henry Martini elephant gun is primed and loaded -- groot trek 2014 here we come...
Roon/tidal > Squeezebox touch> Trinnov St2 >2x Devialet D premiers>  Vivid audio Giya G1 spirits ..fully treated room

Offline Kent Kassler

Re: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club
« Reply #53 on: January 13, 2014, 11:07:53 PM »
....i had no idea you were a Voortrekker. :point:
Audiophile Sound Sommelier Extraordinaire....aka Manic Depressive Temporary Void Filler Deluxe.

Offline Rodney_gold

Re: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club
« Reply #54 on: January 13, 2014, 11:08:22 PM »
Haven't you noticed my immaculately coiffed hair , the reek of aftershave and the skin tight spandex tights.. Moi Bi? ..How VERY dare you...
Roon/tidal > Squeezebox touch> Trinnov St2 >2x Devialet D premiers>  Vivid audio Giya G1 spirits ..fully treated room

Offline Rodney_gold

Re: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club
« Reply #55 on: January 13, 2014, 11:09:27 PM »
....i had no idea you were a Voortrekker. :point:
You didnt see my little hoedjie?
Roon/tidal > Squeezebox touch> Trinnov St2 >2x Devialet D premiers>  Vivid audio Giya G1 spirits ..fully treated room

Offline Kent Kassler

Re: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club
« Reply #56 on: January 13, 2014, 11:15:02 PM »
 :whistler:....Rodney,it seems awful quiet round here.....
Audiophile Sound Sommelier Extraordinaire....aka Manic Depressive Temporary Void Filler Deluxe.

Offline Henry

Re: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club
« Reply #57 on: January 13, 2014, 11:27:39 PM »
You buggers are all gonna scar me for life.  It seems I am about to attend at my peril.  :facepalm:

Offline skollie

  • R.I.P.
  • Trade Count: (+5)
  • AVForums Grandmaster
  • *****
  • Posts: 5,915
  • Total likes: 1
  • Cableth make no differenth. Ith all in the plugth.
    • Blue Angel
Re: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club
« Reply #58 on: January 14, 2014, 01:32:50 AM »
Don't they keep a selection of rottangs in the staff room? The 6 of the best kind??

mafioso
If you don't like my principles, I have others - Groucho Marx

Offline chrisc

  • Trade Count: (+134)
  • AVForums Grandmaster
  • *****
  • Posts: 10,815
  • Total likes: 413
  • Cape Town Hi-Fi Club - get better sound
Re: The Cape Town Hi-Fi Club
« Reply #59 on: January 14, 2014, 07:53:21 AM »
30 days to go...
Music is the shorthand of emotion