Author Topic: Kent Kassler's Korner....  (Read 22386 times)

Offline bal1981

Re: Kent Kassler's Korner....
« Reply #15 on: August 22, 2012, 04:59:46 PM »
Best thread Ever!!! bwahahaha

Offline Robert_E

Re: Kent Kassler's Korner....
« Reply #16 on: August 22, 2012, 06:05:05 PM »
Kent Kassler's Korner


:thinking:



Offline Kent Kassler

Re: Kent Kassler's Korner....
« Reply #17 on: August 22, 2012, 06:14:00 PM »
...you wanna give my good friend Oprah a heart attack?
Audiophile Sound Sommelier Extraordinaire....aka Manic Depressive Temporary Void Filler Deluxe.

Offline placebo

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Re: Kent Kassler's Korner....
« Reply #18 on: August 22, 2012, 08:32:56 PM »
Dear Kent,
I see you refer to me as "mein Chatz" twice in your reply to my earlier post.This has two meanings which are "my dear"or "my precious".It is obvious to me that you regard my questions and my mental state in high esteem.While I do not quite understand the rest of your answer I do have a further problem which I hope you can answer in words or sentences which I may understand.As you may know I also obtained my Doctorate from Harrington University and was in no manner attempting to downgrade your degree obtained from the same learned institution.
 To get back to my problem?This fellow Andre claims to have given me 1000 valves which he claimed would fit into any machine of my choice.I therefore being a person of trusting nature and requiring new valves for my Ford Thunderbird V8 fitted sixteen (i.e 8 inlet and 8 exhaust)of these valves to my beloved vehicle as seen in my avatar.On cranking the motor none of these so called valves worked.
 To cut along story short I changed these valves no less than 62 times (which meant stripping the head)62 times.Needless to say none of the valves worked which forced me to purchase 16 new valves from Mohammed's honest "Pirated parts and Used Taxi Parts"open lot in Diepsloot.
 Be that as it may this fellow Andre has hounded my goodself to such an extent that I was forced to spend 3 weeks in a mental institution.To cut a long story short Mein Chatz Kent I have today spent about 7 hours downloading the 1926 items this fellow Andre has sold using my state of the art 56k TelKom connection and printing each and every page via my 1 page per minute reliable IBM printer of all items sold by this fellow Andre.I have mailed the 4223 pages via our reliable SAPO system marked "fragile"to ensure it arrived intact to SARS.

T hope this action meets with your approval.

Regards and best wishes(I really enjoy your Korner)

DR Klaus Knopf

For,when money or oiled hands determine the voting outcome,particularly in a matter of such monumental importance,then no conscience or oath finds expression.

Chief Justice Mogoeng Mogoeng

Offline Kent Kassler

Re: Kent Kassler's Korner....
« Reply #19 on: August 22, 2012, 11:31:14 PM »
 ;D......i needed that...nearly woke Urshie up which would not have been good,I get the feeling lately that I'm on the verge of being traded in and laughter is not the sound she wants me producing....i always thought we had a little more than those who failed before us but the truth is that I am not so sure anymore...i always thought that success made a failure out of you...turns out failure does too. ???
Audiophile Sound Sommelier Extraordinaire....aka Manic Depressive Temporary Void Filler Deluxe.

Offline Kent Kassler

Re: Kent Kassler's Korner....
« Reply #20 on: August 23, 2012, 12:25:10 AM »
...i mean how much more degrading and belittling can things get,I have friends whose wives have left them for athletes and fitness trainers,10second 100m sprinters and freefall divers etc and mine wants a "better communicator"....that's like leaving me for a better orator and I demand that she sleep with someone before I will accept that as a reason, I can't cope with that,I mean a wife who leaves because you are not physically compatible is one thing but "we don't talk like we used to".....just this morning she said to me "if you expect me to be an Angel then why don't you create a little bit of heaven for me?"...well it's midnight and I tell you I'm gonna pos this one off to the heavenly skies as soon as she has flown over to the kitchen and made me some tea.....Oprah's behind this I tell you....can you imagine if that Walton housewife had spoken to her hubby like that....she'd be in the barn,under the hay,sock in mouth,struggling for air....
Audiophile Sound Sommelier Extraordinaire....aka Manic Depressive Temporary Void Filler Deluxe.

Offline Kent Kassler

Re: Kent Kassler's Korner....
« Reply #21 on: August 23, 2012, 12:53:51 AM »
..i truly don't understand these Venusians,getting closer to 40 and she wants "to find herself"(i take that to mean sleep with a Jamaican?)...the odds are stacked firmly against me,her aunt's husband Eric took to the rafters and noose when his wife found a flush German(i really liked him Klaus which is why I don't like you),her mom spent years with her dad who enjoyed a bottle of vodka with a can of pine nut.....he stopped drinking after years of abusing and she left him as a reward....all the woman in this bloodline are nuts folks,the menopause years bring this on and my one is perspiring on the pillow next to me........"HELP"
Audiophile Sound Sommelier Extraordinaire....aka Manic Depressive Temporary Void Filler Deluxe.

Offline Robert_E

Re: Kent Kassler's Korner....
« Reply #22 on: August 23, 2012, 06:38:57 AM »
 :thinking:

Sounds like you need either:

A: An aircon

Or

B: A Ray-gun (gets rid of even the most stubborn venusians)

Offline Robert_E

Re: Kent Kassler's Korner....
« Reply #23 on: August 23, 2012, 07:20:08 AM »
Depending on exactly what type of sweaty alien your dealing with:






You might want to call in the professionals.





Offline Kent Kassler

Re: Kent Kassler's Korner....
« Reply #24 on: August 23, 2012, 08:31:32 AM »
Robert,she's a good woman....i just can't help feeling that deep down she feels deprived and I'm the thief,she also suffers with that female chromosome problem that keeps her head in the clouds without the assistance of narcotics,I mean I'm driving in reserve and she's promising the kids a weekend getaway,I'm not blameless mind you,i have allowed Cilift to alter my brain function and turn a once playful and spontaneous chap into a neurotic and bland recluse,constantly checking doors and locks,seldom displaying any real emotion and although I have weaned myself off that poison I just can't seem to regain myself ,and this condition combined with a cold shoulder and nothing more than a pic of Brooke Shields in Blue Lagoon hidden in the bathroom could hardly be considered a meaningful existence.
Audiophile Sound Sommelier Extraordinaire....aka Manic Depressive Temporary Void Filler Deluxe.

Offline Kent Kassler

Re: Kent Kassler's Korner....
« Reply #25 on: August 23, 2012, 08:35:32 AM »
...my prized one of Agnetha disintegrated and i was forced to switch :(
Audiophile Sound Sommelier Extraordinaire....aka Manic Depressive Temporary Void Filler Deluxe.

Offline Kent Kassler

Re: Kent Kassler's Korner....
« Reply #26 on: August 23, 2012, 08:43:29 AM »
...I've even taken to writing bits and pieces drawn from memory,I would be happy to share if you guys aren't bored yet?
Audiophile Sound Sommelier Extraordinaire....aka Manic Depressive Temporary Void Filler Deluxe.

Offline Ju_dy@RT

Re: Kent Kassler's Korner....
« Reply #27 on: August 23, 2012, 12:37:37 PM »
 :-[**speechless**  :-[... yes, that is possible for a woman.

Offline Shonver

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Re: Kent Kassler's Korner....
« Reply #28 on: August 23, 2012, 01:17:13 PM »
...I've even taken to writing bits and pieces drawn from memory,I would be happy to share if you guys aren't bored yet?

Best do it while your memory's still good.
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Offline alternativeroute

Re: Kent Kassler's Korner....
« Reply #29 on: August 23, 2012, 01:33:08 PM »
Hi Kent,

I battle to tell the difference (in sound) between CD players and amplifiers. I really want to fit in but am scared I will be outed as "bronze ear" audiophile.

Any suggestions on how to wing it convincingly?

Regards
Wanna be Golden ear*


*real name with-held


The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.  :nutter: