Author Topic: Joke for the day  (Read 665532 times)

Offline Viagara

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Joke for the day
« on: January 23, 2008, 09:00:07 AM »
A driver is stuck in a traffic jam on the Ben Schoeman Highway Nothing is moving.

Suddenly a man knocks on the window. The driver rolls down his window and asks, :  "What's going on?"

"Terrorists have kidnapped Zuma, Winnie, Dr Manto and Mugabe . They're asking for a
R 310 million ransom, otherwise they're going to douse them with petrol and set them on fire.  We're going from car to car, taking up a collection."

The driver asks:  "How much is everyone giving, on average?"

"About a litre."
Don't take life too seriously, you will not make it out alive.....

(Location Cape Town)
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Offline Andrew

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Re: Joke for the day
« Reply #1 on: January 23, 2008, 10:12:02 AM »
 ;D
Don't judge me for being quiet - no one plans a murder aloud.

Offline kay

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Re: Joke for the day
« Reply #2 on: January 23, 2008, 11:24:52 AM »
:D

Offline DACMan1

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Re: Joke for the day
« Reply #3 on: January 24, 2008, 08:30:40 AM »
Gatiep and Karools are sitting on death row.

Gatiep says to the Warden : Does this take long and is it painfull?

Warden say's no they just strap you in and flick the switch and its over.

Karools is called in, moments later Gatiep hears screeming shouting and this carries on for quite a while.

Gatiep complains to the Warden : I thought you said it was quick and painless.

Warden replies that as result of the load shedding they have to use candles.

Offline Viagara

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Re: Joke for the day
« Reply #4 on: January 24, 2008, 08:47:01 AM »
 :D
Don't take life too seriously, you will not make it out alive.....

(Location Cape Town)
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Offline Ampdog

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Re: Joke for the day
« Reply #5 on: January 26, 2008, 05:50:24 PM »
Those are jokes for 2 days ago. Where is Joke for the Day?
Audio must be the only branch of engineering where lack of basics' knowledge is considered a superior form of wisdom. (Anon)

Offline Blues

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Re: Joke for the day
« Reply #6 on: January 26, 2008, 07:28:57 PM »
what did south africans use to light up their homes before they used candles ?
























electricity
I had the blues, so bad one time,
It put my face in a permanent frown
Now I'm feelin' so much better,
I could cakewalk into town

Offline Viagara

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Re: Joke for the day
« Reply #7 on: January 28, 2008, 11:11:54 AM »
DIE STORIE VAN DIE 3 BEERTJIES
 
Bababeer  sit in sy klein stoeltjie by die tafel, en kyk na sy klein papbordjie. . . . . .
"Wie't my pappies geŽet?" vra hy. . . .
Pappabeer kyk na sy groot papbord. . . .
"Wie de duiwel het my pap geŽeet?"   vra hy . . . .
 
Mammabeer se kop verskyn om die kombuisdeur. . . . . . .
 
 
 
 " EK.
HET.
NOG.
NIE.
DIE.
PAP.
GEMAAK.
NIE.
WANT .......   
 
 












 
DIE F%$#@N KRAG IS ALWEER AF!!!
Don't take life too seriously, you will not make it out alive.....

(Location Cape Town)
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Offline Ampdog

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Re: Joke for the day
« Reply #8 on: January 29, 2008, 03:01:53 AM »
 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Goed, ek sal nie weer nie. (Kan nie hier sien nie - die krag is af.)
Audio must be the only branch of engineering where lack of basics' knowledge is considered a superior form of wisdom. (Anon)

Offline Neil

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Re: Joke for the day
« Reply #9 on: January 29, 2008, 06:56:06 AM »
hehehehe julle mense is mal ne!
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Offline Blues

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Re: Joke for the day
« Reply #10 on: January 29, 2008, 07:43:35 PM »
     
        Here's a one-question IQ Test to help you decide how you should
        spend the rest of your day......

        There is a mute who wants to buy a toothbrush.

        By imitating the action of brushing one's teeth, he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done.

        Now, if there is a blind man who wishes to buy a pair of sunglasses,
        how should he express himself?
        Think about it first before scrolling down for the answer... 
         
         
         
         
         
         
         
         
         
         
         
         
        He opens his mouth and says. "I would like to buy a pair of Sunglasses."
        If you got this wrong, please turn off your computer and call it a day.

        I've got mine shutting down right now.
I had the blues, so bad one time,
It put my face in a permanent frown
Now I'm feelin' so much better,
I could cakewalk into town

Offline Shonver

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Re: Joke for the day
« Reply #11 on: January 29, 2008, 10:33:14 PM »
You had no right to do that... >:(
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Offline Ampdog

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Re: Joke for the day
« Reply #12 on: January 29, 2008, 11:17:23 PM »
Blues....

No respect for the stupid ...
Audio must be the only branch of engineering where lack of basics' knowledge is considered a superior form of wisdom. (Anon)

RR

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Re: Joke for the day
« Reply #13 on: January 30, 2008, 07:20:43 PM »
Most definitely the joke for today; the minister of minerals and energy said:

"Sleep more, it will save energy, and you even get cleverer" ??? ??? ??? ??? ::) ::) ::) ::)

I thought it was April fool's day when I read it........

Since she is black and I'm white, I don't want to give my real opinion such as the word 'retard' etc. Rather go and read the black forum-contributors comments on News24. They've put the axe into her well enough.

Offline Hennie

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Re: Joke for the day
« Reply #14 on: January 30, 2008, 08:18:32 PM »
Eskom engineers working on the load shedding problem
« Last Edit: January 30, 2008, 08:22:40 PM by Hennie »